Post-Mortem
by PurpleCadet
Summary: An idea based on one of the new promo pics featuring Harvey and Donna ominously wearing black. Harvey finally deals with his unresolved mother issues and Donna is along for the ride. Darvey obviously. Because what other pairing is there?
1. Personal Days and Black Slacks

Hello beautiful Darvey fans! I got the idea for this fic from one of the promo pics for Season 6B. This will be a couple of chapters but this first one is really just a prologue.

* * *

 **Chapter One: Personal Days and Black Slacks**

He glanced down at his black shirt and slacks, debating a change of clothes. His shirt and pants were bound to get wrinkled during the drive. The last thing he wanted was to arrive in Connecticut a rumpled mess and give Marcus the insane notion that this day was something he'd actually lost sleep over.

He heard the front door open, followed by the familiar clatter of heels.

"You know, when I said, _'I'm taking a personal day'_ that was not an invitation for you to join me."

Donna shrugged as she deposited her purse on his kitchen counter.

"Then perhaps you should have come up with a better excuse."

Harvey paused, taking in her attire.

"You're wearing black."

"That's usually the most respectful sartorial choice."

"Donna…" he sighed, drawing out her name exasperatedly.

She pointed at his pants. "Those are going to wrinkle on the drive over."

Harvey brushed past her, ignoring the observation. "Go back to the office, Donna. Or better yet, take your own personal day."

He made quick strides to the front door, politely, but insistently holding it open for her.

Donna collected her purse from the counter and met him in the doorway.

"I'm going around the corner to pick up coffee. In ten minutes I expect you to be changed, downstairs and holding a dry cleaning bag with a suit inside. Preferably Tom Ford."

Harvey narrowed his eyes.

"They're all Tom Ford," he grumbled in acquiesce.

"Then you'll have options, won't you?"

Donna wore a self-satisfied smile as she slipped through the doorway and headed for the elevator. He waited until she was out of sight to trudge back into his bedroom to change.

* * *

"Wow, you're actually _letting_ me drive?"

Donna slid into the passenger seat with ease. "I didn't want you to feel emasculated in your own car."

"Gee, thanks for that," Harvey said as he took his seat beside her.

Donna placed both coffee cups into the holder between them and buckled her seat belt. She stared at Harvey expectantly as he tapped his fingers on the steering wheel.

"Harvey?"

He turned to her. "I don't know how you found out but since I can't seem to talk you out of tagging along today, I want you to promise that we will not talk about it."

"Harvey –"

"I'm not kidding, Donna. This isn't going to be one of those times where I say, _'I don't want to talk about it'_ and you harangue me until I do."

Donna flinched, offended by the remark.

"I'm also going to be an ass today," he said softly, by way of apology.

"I can handle it, Harvey."

"And you won't try to browbeat me into discussing my feelings?"

"Not this time," she promised.

He nodded. "Then we have an agreement."

* * *

Harvey sank back into his chair, fighting to keep his amusement at bay.

"Louis, I'm tired of having this argument with you."

"I don't understand what the big deal is."

"You are not moving into Jessica's office."

"Jessica's _old_ office," he corrected.

"You have a perfectly good office."

"A perfectly good office with shitty sun exposure."

"Get another desk lamp."

"Get another partner."

"Get a life."

"Get a girlfriend."

"Uh, boys, I hate to interrupt this battle of wits but Harvey has a call waiting," Donna's voice cut through the intercom.

Louis scoffed and leaned back in his chair to glare at Donna.

"We're in a meeting!" he shouted.

Harvey rolled his eyes, sharing a look with Donna.

"The intercom works both ways, Louis. You do realise that through the magic of technology I can actually hear you?"

"Well take a message, this is important," he instructed.

"This is decidedly _not_ important, Louis," Harvey said.

"Jessica isn't dead, Harvey. You don't have to keep a shrine for her."

Harvey stood up from his desk and opened the door to his office. He walked out and paused at Donna's desk.

"Donna, get Louis out of my goddamn office."

Louis huffed and jumped out of his chair, pounding for the door.

"This discussion is not over, Harvey."

Donna grinned at him, eyes sparkling. "You don't really care about keeping Jessica's office the way it is, do you?"

"Of course not, I just don't want Louis to have it," he told her with a wink.

Donna laughed and stood up. "I'll be in the partner's kitchen. Your brother is on line one."

"Hide some more of those bran bars while you're in there."

Donna smiled back at him over her shoulder, shaking her head.

"Hey, Marcus," Harvey said as picked up the phone in his office.

"Harvey…"

He sat upright at the tone dejected tone of his brother's voice.

"Marcus, what's wrong?"

"I don't uh…I'm not sure how to say this…"

"What happened? Do you need help? Money? What can I do?"

"Jeez, Harvey, I really appreciate your faith in me."

"I didn't mean –"

"Mom's dead. She died this morning."

Harvey felt the blood drain from his face, a horrible numbness settling in his limbs.

"The doctors think she had an aneurysm."

"Was she alone?"

"What?"

"Was she alone?"

"Why does…uh, yeah. She was alone."

"Okay…uh…" He spotted Donna walking back to her desk. "I'll call you back."

"Harvey?"

He hung up abruptly as Donna entered his office. She set a file on his desk.

"Quick chat," she observed.

"Yeah, he just wanted to remind me that it's Amy's birthday next week."

"Well it's a good thing her uncle already bought her a gift."

He looked up at Donna, forcing a grin on his face.

"Wow, I'm good aren't I?"

Donna smirked knowingly. "The best."

She reached for stack of briefs by his laptop. "Do you need anything else?"

Harvey shook his head distractedly. Donna hovered at his desk. "You're sure?"

"I'm fine. Thanks, Donna."

* * *

Harvey watched Donna from the corner of his eye while they sat in peak hour traffic. She had been fighting to stay awake for the better part of an hour.

"You know you're the only person I know who can actually sleep _after_ drinking coffee."

Donna forced her eyes open. "Old habit," she said sheepishly.

"Old habit?"

"My parents used to make lots of trips into the City but always at the crack of dawn. They preferred to _beat_ the traffic."

Harvey briefly interrupted her with a well-timed honk at the immobile Volvo in front of them.

"Something about sitting in a car for extended periods of time makes me drowsy."

"I didn't ask you to come," Harvey snapped at her.

"Yes, you've made that abundantly clear," she responded, just as sharply.

Harvey and Donna settled back into uncomfortable silence as the traffic finally started to thin out.


	2. Lilies and Wakes

Here we are with my quickest chapter update ever. Hope you enjoy! I'm also shamelessly going to plug another fic of mine - _Before And After._ It's a one-shot that's a whopping 8,000 words long that I'm rather proud of so if you have some spare time give it a read :)

* * *

 **Chapter Two: Lilies and Wakes**

His first thought pulling into the driveway of his mother's house was that he didn't recognise it, even though she had lived there for almost a decade.

It was a modest house, the front porch beginning to buckle under its weight, the garden untamed and overgrown. He suddenly thought of his dad mowing their front lawn when he was a kid, his mother standing close by, watching with Marcus on her hip, as if she couldn't bear to be away from his father for long. The memory was fuzzy at best; he couldn't have been older than five.

He turned off the ignition and climbed out of the car. He crossed over to the passenger's side and opened the door for Donna. She looked at him strangely, but chose not to comment on the oddly placed moment of chivalry.

"I thought I'd meet Marcus first and we'd head over to the cemetery together."

"Okay…"

"You don't have to…"

Donna quirked an eyebrow as if to challenge him. Harvey shook his head. "He'll be happy to see you."

"Go on. I'll get your stuff."

Harvey nodded in gratitude. He shuffled up the well-beaten path towards the front door. He raised his hand to knock before he realised the absurdity of such a thing.

"Marcus?" he called as he stepped inside.

He wasn't sure what he expected walking into his mother's home, but the foyer was stuffed with white lilies, presumably for the wake. He almost rolled his eyes. His brother did always lack creativity. He noticed several of his mother's paintings lining the walls and noted with only a hint of bitterness that he couldn't see any pictures of himself or his brother.

"Harvey, hey," he said, more than a little surprised.

His little brother looked awful; his pale face clammy and full of anguish. Eyes lined with deep, dark circles. Did he ever look this terrible when his dad died? He couldn't imagine ever looking so defeated.

He wrapped Marcus in a tight, awkward hug.

"What can I do?"

Marcus pulled away, shaking his head. "Just get me there in one piece, okay? I'll be a mess if I have to get behind the wheel."

Harvey clapped a hand on his shoulder. "You got it."

He watched Marcus' eyes find Donna in the doorway, a sight that almost managed to wrangle a smile out of his brother.

Donna embraced him easily, one arm poised delicately on his shoulder, the other going to the base of his neck, comforting him as if he were her own brother. He was reminded of another image, more recent in memory – the two of them standing in his office, side by side, trying not to break down in front of each other after Gordon died. She never hugged him, he realised. For some reason it hadn't mattered then.

"You holding up okay?" she asked his brother kindly.

"Pushing through. It's good to see you, Donna." Marcus glanced pointedly at Harvey. "It means a lot that you'd come."

Donna, surprisingly, missed the look that passed between them. "Of course," she said.

"I better go check that the girls are ready."

"Yeah, I should change," Harvey said.

"Bathroom is down the hall, second door on the left."

Harvey emerged from the bathroom a few minutes later, dressed in a dark suit, his black tie under his collar, untied. Donna eyed him questioningly as he greeted her in the foyer. He shrugged.

"You're going to fix it anyway."

She smiled, wordlessly reaching for his tie. Harvey watched her hands as she effortlessly looped his tie into a Windsor knot. He glanced up to find her quietly watching him. Her eyes flicked back down to her hands as she tightened the tie into a perfect knot.

"All done."

"You're good at that."

"Years of practice."

He stared openly at her for a moment, almost smiling at the way she shifted under his gaze. She wore a simple, fitted black dress. He tried to remember a time she ever wore black. He'd grown so accustomed to the bright, print dresses she adorned for the office.

"You look nice."

"Thanks."

"I meant to tell you before," he confessed.

Marcus re-entered the foyer, now with his wife and daughters in tow. Harvey greeted his sister-in-law with a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Hi, Sarah."

Her smile brightened as she said, "We've missed you, Harvey." She glanced down at her daughters. "Haven't we girls?"

The eldest, Melanie, rushed forward to wrap her arms around Harvey's waist. His hand came to rest on the crown of her head. Her sister, Amy, quickly grew jealous of the attention and clambered over to his other side. Harvey gave her a one-armed hug.

He looked over to Donna, who shared a smile with Sarah.

"It's lovely to see you again, Sarah," Donna said.

"You too, it's been a few years hasn't it?"

"I'm sure we can blame Harvey for that," Marcus chimed in.

Harvey ignored his brother's comment and instead introduced his nieces to Donna. "Amy, Melanie. This is my friend, Donna."

Amy waved from Harvey's side. Melanie trotted over to Donna and hugged her mid-section tightly. Donna smiled warmly at her. "Nice to meet you sweetheart."

Melanie smiled up at her. "You have very pretty hair."

Donna ran her hands through Melanie's wavy, golden hair. "So do you, like a mermaid."

Melanie beamed up at her.

"Come on, girls. You're riding with mommy," Marcus said, slowly ushering them out the door.

"Can Donna come with us too?" Melanie asked her father.

Marcus smiled patiently at his daughter then directed his eyes to Donna.

"I'd be happy to," Donna offered.

Melanie entwined her fingers with Donna's, pulling her toward the front door.

"I hope you don't mind riding in back, Donna. You might lose a hand if you try to let go," Sarah said as the four headed for the exit.

Donna threw a quick glance back at Harvey. He nodded with a slight roll of his eyes, silently communicating that he would be okay without her.

* * *

"The cemetery isn't far from here. Just follow Sarah."

"No problem."

Harvey stretched out a hand to turn up the radio before Marcus cut off his movements and muted the station.

"You're a real dick, you know that?"

"Okay, I guess we're doing this now."

"I wasn't even sure you were coming."

Harvey flinched, fixing his brother with a glare.

"Of course I would. We're family."

Marcus snorted. "Sure, when it's convenient."

Harvey sucked in a breath, clenching his jaw.

"When was the last time you even saw her? Four Christmases ago? Longer? I'm pretty sure Melanie wasn't even speaking yet."

"Must have been around there," he mumbled non-committedly.

He decided not to tell his brother that he'd actually seen their mother nine months ago on the anniversary of their father's death. He'd caught the train upstate, just like every other year, only he was more miserable than usual. Donna had left him for Louis only a month before, he was having far too frequent panic attacks and was reluctantly meeting with Doctor Agard once a week.

He'd been in a shitty frame of mind to begin with and he wanted nothing more than to have a quiet drink with his Dad when he saw Lily Specter kneeled down in front of his father's grave with a bouquet of flowers.

He had turned around, gotten on the next train and headed straight back to the City. It was the first year he'd broken tradition. Just one more thing in his life that his mother had tainted.

"The girls are getting big."

"They'll be playing for the Knicks in no time."

Harvey smiled easily.

"I know they wish they could see you more," Marcus pressed.

"I'll be up for Thanksgiving this year."

"Will you?"

Harvey averted his eyes. He had made that same promise last year too.

"Like I said, I wasn't even sure you'd show up today."

Harvey gripped the steering wheel, focusing on Sarah's car ahead of them.

"Let it go, will you?"

"It's a pretty sad state of affairs that I had to convince Donna to come just to be sure you'd get here."

Harvey jerked his head, staring hard at his brother.

"That woman is too good for you."

"We're here," Harvey said through gritted teeth. He parked alongside Sarah and braked hard, putting the car into park. Harvey climbed out of the car before Marcus even had the chance to unbuckle his seat belt.

He locked eyes with Donna, who immediately grew concerned. He brushed past her but she snagged his wrist with cat-like reflexes.

"Hey, are you okay?"

"I'm about to bury my mother, Donna. I'm just great."

Donna snatched her hand back at his clipped tone.

"Did something happen with Marcus?"

"I don't know, Donna, you tell me, since you two seem to love talking behind my back."

Harvey turned to walk away again, but Donna reached for his hand once more. She leaned into him, her voice low, "I came here for you today and I would never have even known about your mother if it weren't for Marcus. _You_ keep secrets from _me_ , so I wouldn't start throwing stones."

Harvey shook his hand from her grasp. He looked over at his brother and his family, four pairs of eyes watching them intently.

"Are you done?" he whispered to Donna.

"Yeah," she sighed. "I'm done."

* * *

It was a small, brief service held outside. Harvey recognised a few faces, cousins he hadn't seen in years, some close friends of Marcus. There were older men and women, probably friends of his mother's, he mused. He didn't bother to introduce himself to the unfamiliar faces. He simply sat, Donna by his side, studiously keeping quiet.

Marcus spoke for a few moments, sharing an anecdote about his mother that Harvey did not feature in, nor did he recognise. Even after the affairs, Marcus had stood by his mother, unflinchingly loyal. A part of him had always hated his little brother for it.

The service was lead mostly by a priest, which Harvey found gloomily ironic, considering the vows that his mother had so carelessly broken, year after year.

When it was over, Harvey couldn't help but notice that nobody had cried, at least not the way people had at his father's funeral. His father was revered by his friends, deeply beloved by those who knew him best. It suddenly saddened him to think that nobody would mourn his mother the same way.

Only half of the crowd who attended the service made it back to his mother's house. He watched Marcus cross back and forth between guests, offering scotch and gratitude.

Harvey chose to hang back with a scotch of his own, keeping an eye on his nieces as they quietly coloured at the kitchen table.

Donna pulled away from a few of his second cousins and joined him at the table, a fresh glass of scotch in her hand. She slid it over to him as a peace offering. Harvey was all too aware that it was he who needed to do the grovelling, not her.

"Nice turnout," Donna remarked.

Harvey glanced around at the meagre turnout.

"Quit being polite, Donna. It doesn't suit you," he said lightly.

She smirked, sipping her own scotch thoughtfully. She smiled over at his nieces.

"I'm surprised they aren't colouring on an iPad."

Harvey chuckled. "There's no way Marcus would stand for that."

"Smart man, your brother."

"Look Donna, we drew you!" Melanie exclaimed from the other side of the table. She nudged her sister who held up a picture of what resembled a mermaid with orange hair and a blue tail.

Donna grinned. "Well that's beautiful, now you have to draw Uncle Harvey as a mermaid too!"

"Oh good idea," Melanie said seriously, gathering more pencils for herself and Amy.

Harvey shook his head. "Gee, thanks for that," he said to Donna.

Amy stood up from the table, clutching the picture in her hand. She shuffled over to Donna and held it out for her proudly. Donna hoisted her onto her lap, tickling her sides. Amy squealed in delight.

"One day and you've already won them over."

"If I recall correctly I won you over right away too."

"That you did."

They smiled softly at one another, settling into silence. Some days Harvey lived for these quiet moments with her.

"You should go talk to your brother."

Harvey shook his head stubbornly. "I have nothing to say to him, Donna."

"Actually, you owe him a thank you, because he took care of everything today and he didn't once ask for your help."

"I did the same when my Dad died if you remember."

Donna tilted her head sadly. "Of course I remember."

Harvey swallowed his scotch, eyes searching the room for his brother. He spotted him leaving the living room. He set his glass down, sighing.

"Don't corrupt my nieces while I'm gone."

"No scotch, only vodka, got it," she said with a nod.

Harvey smirked, taking off after Marcus.

He found him moments later by the front door, caught up in conversation with an older man who seemed to have just arrived. Their conversation came to an abrupt halt when Harvey greeted them. When the man turned toward Harvey he finally registered his face.

He laughed darkly. "Are you fucking kidding me?"

"Harvey…" Marcus said, trying to placate him.

"You've got some nerve, Bobby."

"Harvey, I just came to pay my respects."

"Great, now that you've completely disrespected my family once again, you can get the hell out."

Bobby looked torn.

"Harvey, settle down, this is ancient history."

Harvey turned to Marcus, his anger boiling over. "And I guess that makes it okay? He completely tears our family apart, but hey, it was over twenty years ago so it may as well never happened."

"Don't do this here, Harvey," Marcus pleaded.

"I should go," Bobby interrupted.

"Great idea, Bobby. You were bound to have one eventually."

"Enough, Harvey."

"I am sorry for your loss, please believe me."

"Out."

Bobby did as instructed, closing the door quietly behind him. Harvey turned to his brother in disbelief.

"You actually let that guy in here? Are you shitting me?"

"Harvey!" Marcus snapped. "This is ridiculous. The man just wanted to give his condolences."

"Yet he had nothing to say while he was screwing Mom behind Dad's back."

"Keep it down," he said in a harsh whisper.

"You never gave a shit. I can't believe you would still be on her side after all these years."

"Well someone had to be!"

Harvey stepped toward Marcus, pointing at him. "You've always been spineless."

Marcus shoved Harvey but he brushed it off.

"Sticking up for her when she was nothing but a cheater and a liar."

"Harvey, it's her goddamn wake for Christ's sake."

Harvey stopped and finally noticed the dead silence in the other room.

"Marcus I-"

His brother pushed past him. "Have another drink, Harvey."

He stood still, watching his brother walk away from him.

"Harvey," Donna said, interrupting the silence.

He shook his head hopelessly. "Get me out of here?"

"Sure, I'll drive us back."

"No. I'm not ready to, uh…"

"Okay." She was at his side in second, a soothing hand on his forearm. "I'll take care of it."


	3. Scotch and Budget Inns

Thank you all for your patience for this next update! I had a very big new years that involved a four day camping festival and I'm finally now recovered. Hope you enjoy, I've got another chapter kicking around that should be up soon.

* * *

 **Chapter Three: Scotch and Budget Inns**

There were few things in life that Harvey found more pathetic than getting drunk in the middle of the day, but getting drunk inside the bar of a Budget Inn after being thrown out of his mother's wake certainly ranked amongst one of his life's lower moments.

"I got you out of there, didn't I?" Donna said after he shared this thought with her.

Harvey gestured toward the guests that littered the bar; love-sick middle-aged couples, jovial retirees, men and women that were clearly about to engage in a nooner. He stared glumly inside his empty glass.

"Everybody looks too happy. I feel like I'm at a goddamn wedding."

Donna rolled her eyes fondly.

"It's a Tuesday."

Harvey narrowed his eyes at Donna's tall glass of mineral water.

"Are you suddenly opposed to drinking with me?"

"One of us has to drive home," she gently reminded him.

 _Home._

Home to an empty condo with more glass walls than his office. Every flat surface grey or chrome. Donna, this morning, encased in black, was still the brightest thing to set foot in his apartment in months.

He shrugged. "So we'll get a room."

Donna raised her eyebrows. "Oh, _we'll_ get a room, will we?"

He waved her off. "Not like that. We'll get two rooms."

Donna shook her head, taking a sip of mineral water. "I don't think so, Harvey."

Harvey waved down the bar tender, gesturing for a refill. He ignored Donna's pointed sigh beside him.

"One for her too."

Donna smiled politely at the bartender. "I'm fine, thanks."

"Two," Harvey insisted to the man.

"Sure thing, buddy," he replied, pouring two glasses of Macallan, neat.

As he walked away, Donna turned to him, "Harvey…"

"It's been a shitty day, Donna. You're the only person I want to have a drink with."

Donna tore her eyes away from, suddenly captivated by her drink. "Are you finally going to tell me what happened back at your mother's house?" she asked tentatively.

"I don't want to." She nodded in understanding. "But we both know I will anyway," he continued, a fond smile gracing his lips.

But Donna didn't smile. She looked thoughtful before she said, "I don't want to push you, Harvey."

He almost laughed. "Donna, all you have ever done is push me into admitting my feelings."

She looked up at him sharply. _Idiot,_ he immediately berated himself. He cleared his throat uncomfortably. "The guy who showed up at the house was one of the _many_ men my mother had an affair with while she was married to my Dad."

"Oh, Harvey."

"And Marcus just let him inside like it didn't matter, like the guy had some kind of claim to her, a right to be there."

Donna stayed silent. Harvey narrowed his eyes. "Are you kidding me? You agree with him?"

Donna reared back in defence. "Don't put words in my mouth. I said nothing."

Harvey scoffed, swallowing half of his scotch in one clean swig. "You didn't have to."

"What has it been, Harvey? Decades? I'm not condoning what she did but you've been holding onto this anger for as long as I've known you," she reasoned.

"I'm not going to suddenly forgive her for everything she put my father through just because she died, Donna."

Harvey watched her purse her lips, swirling her scotch as she contemplated taking a sip.

"Did you ever talk to Doctor Agard about her?"

"Therapy is confidential for a reason, Donna."

"Well that's a big fat yes if I ever heard one."

"That's a big fat _none of your damn business_." His mouth curled into a half-smile, letting her know he wasn't serious.

"Did you talk about me?"

Harvey stared at her a long moment, weighing his words. "I tried not to at first."

Donna seemed to hardly react to the admission, instead she took a sip of her scotch, avoiding his eyes. He didn't know if he was grateful or disappointed that she hadn't tried to press him further.

"I went to see her once."

"My therapist?"

"Right before Mike was arrested. Jessica sent me looking for you."

Harvey tried thinking back to that day, it had to have been months ago. "You were still working for Louis," he realised.

"Didn't matter," she admitted with a shrug.

"He's been driving me crazy," Harvey said, veering into safer territory. "Half the time I feel like he's plotting to edge me out. Then every other day I feel like I'm babysitting my twelve year old brother because our Mom has skipped town."

Donna laughed, her eyes crinkling as she offered him a real smile, the kind that had a tendency to render him speechless.

"Jessica would be mortified to hear you describe her as anything resembling a mother figure to Louis."

Harvey shook his head. "And now he's going to be a parent, God help _that_ kid."

Donna backhanded his shoulder, scolding him.

"Be nice. He'll make a good dad."

Harvey raised his eyebrows at her. "Are we still talking about Louis?"

"He's very affectionate – and doting."

He scoffed, "Yeah, to his cats."

Donna smiled. "He's doing a good thing."

"If you say so."

Donna eyed him sideways, taking another sip.

"Do you think you'll have kids?" he asked impulsively.

He watched Donna almost choke on her scotch. She cleared her throat and put a hand to her chest.

"Wow, that question came out of nowhere."

"How was that out of nowhere? We were just discussing Louis' child rearing capabilities."

"I mean I've worked with you for over twelve years, Harvey. The subject of children has seldom, if ever, come up between us," she corrected.

He knew why he asked. She had collectively spent maybe four hours in the company of his nieces and already they adored her. He had been their Uncle for three _and_ seven years and he already felt overshadowed.

"They seem to like you," he answered non-committedly.

He expected a flippant _"who wouldn't"_ but instead Donna simply said, "I've thought about it."

Harvey felt the heaviness of the moment between them, then felt the almost instinctive desire to quash it.

"If you feel like getting started now we could always book that room."

Donna sighed heavily, unable to keep from rolling her eyes. "I think I liked you better when you were brooding and sulking."

He grinned as he finished off the last of his scotch. Donna stood up beside him.

"I probably shouldn't drive," she told him.

"Are you kidding? I've seen you put away more scotch while studying case files."

"Well one of us was kicked out of the wake before the food was served," she said pointedly as she gathered her purse.

He stood up, following her lead.

"Have your credit card ready," she ordered.

* * *

Harvey rapped softly on the interconnecting door. Donna answered in her white terrycloth robe, towelling her wet hair. He held up a bag of Chinese takeout.

"It's not the shitty Thai place but I thought it would be preferable to room service."

She opened the door further, giving him access to her room.

"Give me a couple of minutes."

As Donna stepped into her adjoining bathroom Harvey surveyed her room. It was roughly the same size as his, with little more than a bed, bathroom and a TV, not a flat surface in sight. He sat on the foot of her bed and began unpacking the takeout.

Donna emerged from the bathroom a few moments later, re-dressed in her funeral garb.

"What are you doing?" he asked, looking her up and down.

"This isn't a sleepover, Harvey. I'm not going to lay around in a bathrobe." She pointed at his well-creased pants and rapidly wrinkling shirt. "Where's your change of clothes?"

"Still at the house. Unless Marcus burned them out of spite."

"Right."

Donna joined him on the bed, hiking her dress just above the knees so she could comfortably sit. She reached straight for the Mongolian beef and the nearest plastic fork while Harvey dug into the container of what he hoped was chicken.

Donna chewed thoughtfully for a moment. "Wow, this is terrible," she finally said.

"It really is."

"You know, I'd probably be fine to drive back to the City by now. We could drive past your mother's house, say goodbye to Marcus?"

Harvey merely grunted at her obvious needling.

"You shouldn't leave things like this, Harvey."

"I'm good here," he said after another bite.

They ate in companionable silence for the next few minutes, Harvey trying not to read too much into the domesticity of it all. Donna was probably right about the bathrobe, he acquiesced.

"Why did you ask me about kids before, Harvey?"

Harvey let out a long sigh. "Are we still on this? I was only curious."

"You're never just _curious_."

"Just leave it, Donna."

He'd lied to himself earlier. He didn't ask her because of how she was with her nieces. In fact, the question didn't even have all that much to do with Donna herself.

"You want them, don't you?" Donna asked, once again tapping into the crux of his feelings.

"I don't know. Maybe I should know by now."

He thought again about Lily's funeral service. He hadn't cried once. Even his brother had barely cried, the most emotion Marcus had shown all day was when he retaliated at Harvey.

"I want people to care when I'm gone, Donna."

Donna's inquisitive stare crumpled before him. She gave him a sad smile.

"You're not your mother, Harvey."

He wasn't so sure about that. He always imagined that he was more like his father. Sure, his moral compass had wavered a number of times over the years. But he was loyal, he didn't cheat and he would go into battle for the few people he cared about.

But he could also be cold, stubborn and emotionally closed off. Like his mother, he had trouble connecting to people in a tangible way. Aside from Jessica, Donna was the longest relationship he had had with anyone in his life. And even then, that friendship had been muddied by his history of taking her for granted. His mother had always taken his father for granted.

He looked at Donna and held her gaze. If he really were like his father, he would have told her how he felt about her years ago.

"I'm gonna turn in. Long day," he told her.

He registered the disappointment on her face, noting that she didn't even look remotely surprised.

Harvey cleared away the takeout containers, pausing at her door on the way out.

"'Night, Donna."

"'Night, Harvey."

* * *

It was late, he hadn't been able to sleep for hours, fitfully tossing and turning in his lumpy bed while he mentally replayed the day.

He sat up at the knock on his door, though he could barely make her out in the dark, he saw Donna let herself inside.

"Donna?"

She made several quick strides over to the bed, where she hovered at the other, empty side.

"Donna –"

"Don't say anything, okay?"

Harvey nodded, clamping his mouth shut. He felt the bed dip when she climbed in beside him. He gently lay back down as Donna did the same. She scooted closer to him then rolled over almost immediately.

He turned on his side, watching her back, faintly noticing that she had slipped her robe back on. He felt her fingers ensnare his wrist. She pulled his arm around her, interlocking their fingers and holding his hand to her chest. Harvey settled against her, nestling his nose into her hair.

"I'd care if you were gone."

He nodded against her neck.

"I know."


	4. Apologies and Amends

Thank you all so much for your wonderful reviews and great patience. Full-time work is a trap, don't buy into it. This is the last chapter and I'm glad I could get it finished in time for next week. Enjoy!

* * *

 **Chapter Four: Apologies and Amends**

Marcus answered the door with his phone still pressed to his ear, his eyes glassy with sleep deprivation.

"Harvey. It's –"

"Six o'clock, I know."

Marcus hung up the phone, shoving it into the pocket of his sweatpants.

"If you know that then what the hell are you doing here?" he grumbled.

"Would you believe me if I told you I came to apologise?"

His brother stared at him, dumbfounded.

"You never apologise for anything."

"Not true. I apologised for hitting on Sarah before I realised she was your girlfriend at the time."

"That's not helping your argument."

Harvey rolled his eyes. "Will you just come outside?"

Marcus grudgingly joined him out on the front porch, taking great care to close the front door quietly. Both brothers sat down at the top of the stairs, elbows resting heavily on their knees.

"So you drove back all this way to apologise, huh?"

"Actually I spent the night at a hotel about ten minutes from here."

"And the apology just keeps getting flimsier…" Marcus said with an easy smile.

"I don't really want to make this into some big scene, so how about I just say I'm sorry for being such a dick and we leave it at that?"

Marcus furrowed his brow, pretending to mull it over.

"Apology accepted big brother." Harvey smirked at the term of endearment. "You're still a dick, though."

Harvey sighed. "Yeah, I know."

As much as he loathed apologising, Harvey knew that he had far more to apologise for than just making an ass out of himself yesterday.

He turned to his brother. "I know you didn't choose sides."

Marcus stared back, bewildered.

"You've been punishing me for years because you thought I took her side," he said quietly.

The guilt Harvey felt was palpable; his brother suddenly seemed so impossibly young.

"I know how much Dad meant to you," Marcus paused briefly before he continued, "But it killed Mom that she didn't see you."

Harvey didn't have reassuring words for his brother. He couldn't say, _"I still loved her anyway"_ or _"I missed her"_ or even, _"I'm sorry I shut her out for so long"._ His mother's betrayal had been a part of him almost as long as she had. The two were inextricably linked in his mind. They probably always would be.

So Harvey said the next best thing, "I kept her painting."

"The duck one?"

"The very same."

Marcus looked surprised. "I thought you hated that painting."

Harvey shook his head. "It's been hanging in my office since I got promoted to Senior Associate."

He decided to omit the fact that he was still trying to get it back after the Elliot Stemple fiasco. Even so, it had been one of the most precious things he owned. If he was sorry for anything, he was sorry it was gone.

"That would have made her happy," Marcus said with a wistful smile.

"I should let you get back inside."

They both stood. "Thanks…thanks for coming back, Harvey."

"I owed it to you," he admitted. _I owed it to Mom too,_ he realised. "Say goodbye to the girls for me."

"I will."

"Hey, out of curiosity, just how mad was Sarah?" he asked.

Marcus chuckled. "Actually, she defended you."

Harvey smirked. "Funny, Donna defended you too."

Marcus' smile slipped from his face. "Is she the reason you came?"

"Not this time," Harvey assured him.

The two shared a quick hug, saying their goodbyes.

"I'll see you at Thanksgiving," he promised as he stepped off the porch.

"You will. And bring Donna."

Harvey glanced back at his brother curiously.

"That gives you a month to pull your head out of your ass."

"Go back inside, Marcus."

Marcus laughed at him, waving.

* * *

By the time Harvey got back to the hotel room Donna was already awake and dressed in her clothes from the day before. He found her sitting upright in his bed, knees hitched up to her chest, a newspaper balanced precariously on her lap.

He knocked lightly on the open door frame, announcing his presence. Donna looked up at him almost shyly. He held up a cardboard tray filled with two tall lattes and a paper bag with two muffins.

"Hungry?" he asked.

"Thirsty."

He grinned, setting down the paper bag on the bedside table and extending the coffee tray to her. She reached for the cup that had _Donna_ scrawled across it, letting her newspaper fall from her lap.

She cradled the cup with both hands, inhaling deeply before she took a long sip, moaning appreciatively.

"You make that look like a religious experience."

"At seven o'clock in the morning it is."

Harvey brought his own cup to his lips as he sat down on the bed by her feet.

"How did the apology go?"

"What apology?"

Donna cocked her head sideways. Harvey matched her expression playfully.

"I told him I was sorry for being a dick yesterday."

He watched her shoulders drop, the disappointment evident on her face.

"And I told him that I know he wasn't dishonouring our Dad by defending our mother."

She raised her eyebrows. "You said that?"

"Well, not in so many words. But the message was clear."

"Wow," she breathed.

"It's not a big deal, Donna," he downplayed.

"I beg to differ."

"It's still weird talking about her. Even weirder now…"

Donna nodded in understanding, "Now that she's gone?"

"Yeah."

Harvey reached for the paper bag on the bedside table. He pulled out the white chocolate blueberry muffin and handed it to Donna. She eyed it sceptically.

"Don't worry, there's fruit in it. I don't need to hear your chunky monkey, chocolate and banana diatribe again."

She smiled fondly at him as she set her coffee and muffin down. "Did you ever think you'd make up with her?"

Although she didn't verbalise the _"before she died",_ he could hear the sentiment loud and clear.

Harvey hadn't given much thought to his mother dying. Maybe once or twice, right after his dad passed, in the privacy of his condo, when he was drunk, pissed off and feeling sorry for himself. He hadn't even taken a full personal day, just the afternoon, but he remembered wanting to be far, far away from Donna, wanting to revel in his misery for a few hours before she tried to piece him back together.

He had almost called his mother that afternoon, wanting to deliver the news before Marcus could, almost wanting to spite her for it. _He died still loving you, even after the hell you put him through,_ he had wanted to say. But even at his worst, Harvey knew he could never be that cruel.

They never did have that argument though. Now they never would. She died while he was still mad at her. She died before she could apologise for it all. She died before he could accept her apology. She died and Harvey was practically a stranger at her funeral.

"I don't know," he told her honestly. "I would have liked the option."

Donna smiled sadly at him. She understood the need for closure, _hell_ , it was why their relationship had been in a bizarre state of limbo ever since the first time they slept together.

"I'm sorry, Harvey." She reached for his hand, lacing their fingers together as if it were something she did every day. "I don't know if I've said that yet.

Harvey squeezed her hand. "Thanks for coming with me yesterday."

"It was no big deal," she answered with a shrug.

"I beg to differ," he said, regurgitating her words. "Marcus was right to call you."

Donna smiled bashfully. "Well, duh."

She put her hands back on the tops of her knees, carefully avoiding his eyes.

"We should get going if we want to be back at the office by midday."

"Actually, there's something I need to do. Something I need to make up for."

"Wow, cryptic."

"Will you come with me?"

"You drove us to Connecticut, remember. I'm kinda stuck with you."

He stayed quiet, letting her know that he was serious; he wouldn't drag her along against her will.

"Of course I'll come, Harvey."

Harvey nodded, rising off the bed. He extended his hand to Donna, lifting her from her sitting position.

"But you get to be the one to call Louis and tell him we're taking a consecutive personal day."

He smiled gleefully. "You say that like it's a punishment."

* * *

Harvey pulled up to their destination, watching Donna closely as the realisation dawned on her face. She turned to him, eyes shining.

"We're here to see your Dad."

He nodded.

"But today it isn't –"

He shook his head.

Her eyes fell down to her lap. "You're never brought me here before."

His eyes never wavered from her. "I've never brought anyone here before."

She looked up sharply, the admission hanging heavily between them.

Harvey escorted her out of the car and down the familiar, well-worn path of the cemetery. He clutched a bottle of Macallan in one hand, while the other rested comfortably on the small of Donna's back.

When they reached Gordon's grave Harvey handed the bottle to Donna. He extracted the three shot glasses that were crammed into the pockets of his jacket. He placed one on his father's headstone, gave one to Donna in exchange for the bottle and kept a firm grip on the third.

As he poured a shot for Donna she said, "This is why we stopped?"

"It's tradition."

Harvey poured a shot for his father and finally one for himself.

"Dad…I'm sorry I didn't stay last time." He glanced at Donna, knowing she had a question poised on her lips. "I figured bringing Donna would make up for it," he said with a smile.

Harvey held up his glass to toast his father. Donna did the same. After a few seconds they both threw their heads back, drinking to his memory.

"You do this every year?" Donna asked as they slowly made their way out of the cemetery.

"Every year."

"And last time you were here?"

"I saw my mother."

"Oh, Harvey."

"Now that I think about it, it's almost like she knew it would be her last opportunity. It sounds crazy when I say it out loud though."

"Not at all."

They strolled in silence, fingers grazing every few steps.

"It means a lot that you'd share this with me, Harvey."

He said nothing, reaching for her hand instead, the gesture becoming more natural by the day.

The drive back to the City was a quiet one; the roads mostly clear before rush hour started. Donna had slept for most of it, eyes fluttering open every fifteen minutes before they fell closed again.

Part of him wanted to wake her. They needed to talk. About last night, about the entire two days, about their entire relationship. Harvey was not oblivious to the irony that when he was finally ready to share his feelings with Donna that she apparently wasn't.

But she'd been patient with him all this time, for years, in fact. He could wait one damn car ride.

They pulled up outside her apartment building in the early hours of the afternoon. Harvey briefly considering going into the office before deciding he'd prefer to torture Louis just a little while longer.

Harvey placed a gentle hand on Donna's knee. "Donna, we're here, wake up."

"Wow that was fast," she said, still a little groggy.

"Well you slept through most of the drive."

"Oops."

They climbed out of the car, Harvey walking Donna to the steps of her building. They stood together awkwardly, neither quite sure what to say to each other, _goodbye_ suddenly sounding so silly and insignificant. _Thank you,_ even more so.

"I'll see you tomorrow, then?" Donna said.

When he didn't immediately respond she started to climb the stairs. Harvey reached for her on reflex, his fingers circling her wrist. She stopped, staring at him curiously.

Harvey tugged lightly on her hand, encouraging her back down the steps, bringing them eye-level again. One hand cupped her cheek delicately, the other finding a home on her hip. His lips brushed hers softly, seeking permission. He half-expected her to pull back in protest before he felt her hand slide through his hair. He responded with more urgency, his tongue sliding languidly against hers, his grip tightening at her waist, pressing her body closer.

They kissed like this for a few moments before they became conscious of the fact that they were still out in broad daylight.

Donna broke the kiss, the slightest blush on her cheeks when she pulled away from him. She smiled and ran her thumb across his bottom lip.

"Just so you know, I would have done that earlier," he confessed.

"Oh, really?"

"I didn't want to give you the wrong impression."

She frowned.

"I mean, I didn't want you thinking it was because of my mother."

Donna laughed. "You really don't do much for a girl's self-esteem, Harvey."

He sighed heavily. Jeez, he was suddenly really bad at this. "You know what I'm trying to say," he said impatiently.

She gave him a brief peck on the lips. "I do. I'm glad you waited."

"Thirteen whole years?"

"I'm going inside now."

Harvey held her hips, keeping her in place. "Donna, I don't ever want to be with anyone else."

"I don't either."

It was an effort to keep from grinning like an idiot. "Good. Then we agree."

"Looks that way."

Donna turned, glancing at her building then back at him. "Do you want to come up?"

"You're exhausted," he pointed out, even though he genuinely couldn't think of anything he'd ever wanted to do more.

"We'll just sleep."

"Donna, you and I both know that if I come up there will not be any sleep happening whatsoever."

She chewed thoughtfully on her lip. Harvey knew she'd barely slept in the last day and a half, had basically lived in her funeral dress for the past twenty-four hours. She was tired and emotionally drained.

"Donna, I'm not going to suddenly change my mind the minute I leave."

"You've done it before."

"This is different. _We're_ different."

Harvey pulled her closer again, kissing her deeply.

When he pulled back he said, "Go upstairs, sleep for a few hours and I'll come over later and take you out to dinner. I'm going to be the gentleman here if it kills me."

She chuckled, stepping out of his embrace.

"Then I will see you in a few hours, Harvey."

When she reached the top step he said, "Don't you change your mind either."

Donna turned back to him and they shared a smile before she stepped inside.

Harvey decided to leave the car parked outside of her building and walk home, he'd be back in a matter of hours anyway, probably sooner.

He pulled his phone out of his pocket, dialing a familiar number.

"What time for thanksgiving?" he asked. There was a pause on the other end. "Yeah, we'll both be there."


End file.
